ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
