this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
