Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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