I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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