question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
