but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
