this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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