chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Its about making memories worth repressing
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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