how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
