he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
