Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize