Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
