apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
