There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
