I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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