Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
