Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
