We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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