I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
oh god was she eating orange peels again
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
