Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
