I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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