Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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