Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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