dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize