His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
