I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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