Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
