hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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