I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
