ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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