I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
