she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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