Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
