Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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