Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
