I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Randomize
