Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Never let your siblings swipe right.
PANTIES FOUND
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
