Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
