I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
she looked like the before picture.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
