the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Let's get the cat blown out
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
