just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
