Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Pappa wants mamma naked
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
We were destined to go to rehab together
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize