Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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