don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
