i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
