He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
