we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
