Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I love having hate sex.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize