found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
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