And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
