so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
