He is an equal opportunity slut.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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